Living With Goals

on August 14, 2023

3 Tips To Help You Succeed With Your Goals

I’m a very goal oriented person, but when one also has the goal of being a better friend, wife, daughter, etc., how you achieve those goals is sometimes in conflict with our work goals. Too late people realize that work was never the goal, right? I think this is what sends many people spinning into a mid-life crisis. So while I’m about to talk about how to achieve work goals, first and foremost make sure you are living in a way that is true to you. When you are with family, be with them one hundred percent. When you listening to your partner, listen one hundred percent. When you are playing with your child, engage one hundred percent. If you…Read More

How to Fight for Your Dreams

on March 27, 2023

Fight For Your Dreams! There are so many great quotes from Robert Kennedy about the power of dreams, and following your dreams, but he is also the one who said, “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” Which is my note for today. It’s easy to say, dream big or go home. Dreaming is the easy part. It’s the doing that’s the scary part. Achieving dreams takes action—sometimes daring action. But there are also practical steps you can take to ensure your goals get a little closer within reach. 1-Knowledge: Become an expert on your dreams. Figure out what you need to know. What is your subject? What is required? What’s going on in the field…Read More

Disappointments Are Defining Moments

on March 13, 2023

How to Handle Being Replaced or Overlooked on the Job

There are always going to be times in our lives when we lose a role on a team, a part in a play, or are replaced by new fresh blood—either at school, work, or at home. This is never an easy experience. It is an experience that can make you feel too old, too young, too inexperienced, inadequate, threatened, embarrassed, and even fearful of becoming irrelevant (and therefore you will lose your job, your partner will dump you, your children will abandon you, and you’ll become homeless and die alone). Yes, there are some who take it all the way to the bitter end. I don’t wish this on anyone. All those emotions are uncomfortable. And I know personally, I…Read More

Authentic Encouragement

on January 30, 2023

How to help a friend, colleague, or family member through a rough spot.

Encouragement is a basic human need. It was late in my life when I really learned the importance and the power of encouragement. Once it struck, it struck deep. I began to understand this basic human need, I’ve gotten a little better at it. I’ve also learned it takes time and practice as well as insight and sincerity to really get it right. It’s easy to be rah-rah. That’s the quick pass at encouragement when you are running around to get stuff done and don’t actually have time to look the person in the face and see what’s up. Or the quick, ‘you can do it’, without recognizing what it really takes for the person to do it. Don’t get…Read More

The Boyfriend List for Girls

on December 5, 2022

35 Things To Put On Your Boyfriend List

Hey, I know everyone would like to have a great boyfriend, right? Well, it’s not as easy to find the good ones as you would think. And let’s be honest, it’s a waste of time drifting from guy to guy hoping he’ll be what you are looking for when, you don’t really know who you are and what you are looking for. That’s why I always recommend The Boyfriend List. It’s important to be clear about what you want and expect. And to make sure you’ve got it right, write it down and focus on it. Of course, whatever you want, make sure you can also give it back. You need to be awesome to attract the awesome guy, right? Unlike in…Read More

Writerly Wednesdays: Needs Vs. Goals in Character Development

on October 28, 2015

The difference between a character's need and a character's goal.

Other writers and teachers may differ, but this how I explain it. A need is an internal, emotional driving force for a character, inherent to who they are. A goal is a short term, outward objective that drives the action, and in best of stories, is linked tightly to the character’s inner need. A character “need” is something that is part of who the character is in life – the thing that defines their purpose. Even when I study my family and friends, I can see how all their decisions are driven by that need, and through that filter. It’s not necessarily the only filter, but as an individual, there is usually a very strong one for each of us. In my last…Read More